Rocking-Chair-Moment

Just when you think you've got a handle on things, life comes along and takes a big, stinky, craptastic dump on you.

When life gets craptastic, and I start to obsess and worry, God has a way of reminding me that the little things in life really are the BIG things.

I had to work until 6 p.m. last night.  When I picked Snuggles up from daycare, he was a mess.  He coughed and whined, and his sweet little baby-blue eyes were red-rimmed and teary.  He skipped his afternoon nap, and I'm sure that exhaustion made his cold feel worse.  When I walked into the room, he looked at me like, "Help me, Mama!"  It broke my heart.

So when I got Snuggles home, I focused on comforting him as much as I could for the brief 1 1/2 hours we had together. When it was time for bed, I indulged in a very special treat.  I rocked Snuggles to sleep.

Since Snuggles was very small, I have tried to teach Snuggles to self soothe.  Rather than nursing him to sleep or rocking him to sleep, I've tried to put him to bed slightly awake.  It worked!  At almost-nine months old, he goes to sleep easily at night, most of the time without any fussing.  But last night I made an exception to the bedtime routine because poor, sick little Snuggles needed comforting...

And to be honest, so did I.

Snuggles and I retreated to the nursery. I dimmed the lights, and we rocked in the glider chair.  He was so sad making that little whimpering sound he only makes when he's sick. We sat in the glider, rocking.  And I sang him our song. 

(To the tune of the Brahms Lullaby)

Go to sleep [Snuggles] Boy.
Go to sleep my little baby.
Go to slee-eep. Go to sleep.
Go to sleep my [Snuggles] Boy.
You are cute.
You are sweet.
But your mama needs her sleep.
You are cute.
You are sweet.
Go to sleep [Snuggles] Boy.

I've been singing this song to Snuggles pretty much since the day he was born.  I'm not sure where the silly lyrics came from. But it works.

As we rocked in the chair, Snuggles curled up his chubby little legs, and laid his sweet head on my chest.  What he did next brought tears to my eyes.

Snuggles lifted his little head, and with his nose almost touching mine, he looked me straight in the eyes... Snuggles can't talk, but his eyes said "I love you" louder than I've ever heard those words spoken.

Snuggles turned his head, and pressed his cheek against mine.  We sat there rocking cheek-to-cheek while I sang our song.  As Snuggles drifted off to sleep, his little head slowly slipped back onto my shoulder.

It was one of the most precious, pure moments I've ever experienced in my life.

No matter how craptastic life was before, I forgot all about it in one rocking-chair-moment.  It was just Snuggles and me rocking in the chair, holding each other... sharing an intimacy that only exists between a mother and her baby. 

Life doesn't get much better than that.