I failed.
I failed.... to keep my New Year's resolution, which was to blog more often.
I failed... as a blogger... I kept my readers waiting with no new posts. (Actually, my blog stats show that only a handful of people read this blog. It's more an outlet for me than for anyone else.)
I failed... as a mother. I lose my cool in the heat of the moment. My cooking is less than impressive, and my house is plain and sometimes messy.
Thankfully, however, there are a few things in my life that I've gotten right. In fact, my biggest success turned three years old today: Snuggles! Happy 3rd Birthday, Snuggles!
It seems like just yesterday I labored for 20 hours and pushed for nearly 3 hours to bring Snuggles into the world. The funniest part of his birthday was that I was recovering from a cold, and I had laryngitis. Seriously. The one time it was socially acceptable for me to scream bloody murder--and maybe even use expletives that aren't a part of my vocabulary--I was completely mute.
Snuggles' birthday is a fog... Well, it's more like a puzzle of memories... Little pieces of the day emerge from the fog. Other than the moment I touched Snuggles for the first time, one of my most vivid memories of Snuggles birthday is the seemingly endless pushing. I was exhausted. Absolutely depleted of energy. They had used two different types of vacuum extractors to try to get Snuggle's head out. I expected to hear the words "Cesarean Section" any minute. But my doctor didn't give up. She sat with me through three hours of pushing, and never left my side. (She is an amazing person, and I don't just mean as a physician!) Dr. Julie, my mom and Guitarman kept telling me, "One more push, Melinda! This is the last one!" For more than an hour, they told me, "This is the last push." I wanted to kick them, but my legs were numb from the epidural. I finally screamed, "Stop telling me this is the last push! You've been saying that for an HOUR!!" However, what I intended to be a scream came out as a very animated whisper. Looking back, it's actually quite humorous. I am such an outspoken person. I've worked for years to control my tongue. (Sometimes I'm successfull, sometimes notsomuch.) Yet on that important day, I couldn't muster a sound. Not so much as a squeak. Maybe God was looking out for all the people in the delivery room that day. :)
Snuggles' birthday was a special day I will never forget, just as I will happily remember his first birthday, which we celebrated surrounded by moving boxes, having just moved to Nashville the day before. His second birthday we celebrated with a Yo Gabba Gabba-themed party. For his third birthday this year, Snuggles enjoyed a simple celebration with family from Indiana, highlighted by a special cake my mom brought from our favorite bakery in Elkhart. Tonight we'll take Snuggles to Chuck E Cheese for dinner and games. He has never been to Chuck E Cheese before, so I'm looking forward to experiencing that with him!
No matter how old he gets, Snuggles will always be my baby boy. As Guitarman and I were discussing today, nothing is as important as family. I've experienced a great deal of failure in life and I've enjoyed some success as well. But my biggest accomplishment, my greatest joy and blessings are wrapped up in a blond-haired, blue-eyed boy with a dimply smile that melts my heart. Thank you, God, for my son. Happy Birthday, Snuggles!
